My get up and go…..

 

For the past few weeks my get up and go has GONE. I just feel so blah, have no motivation at all. I feel lost and just can’t be bothered.

I know some of it is recovering from hand op, that has restricted any exercise. No mojo anyways. Now that I have had bandage off, stitches out and have been cleared to work light duties and to go walking at a moderate pace with no exerting myself I need to find some. Also got some occupational therapy to start attending next week. Then I think, gee it’s only a few weeks then I have my first eye surgery done. 

I can’t sit and mope around indulging in treats most of the day reading like I have done.  I did have a few good days where I ate sensibly, it hasn’t been all bad but the chocolate finds its way back. I was hoping to get some scrapbooking done but I haven’t even been in to get photos printed. I have so many pages that need doing. Want to get an album done of our big trip we did last year before I forget where we actually went…. 🤦‍♀️😳

I know this relapse of my son has really thrown me. I still can’t believe he’s gone and done this. I did ask him when he came home last week to get his fishing drone if he was going to go back to work (he’s on annual leave atm) and get his life on track. He said he was. But then Kylee saw him down the beach a day later “so spaced out” I just can’t believe that he could throw away the life he had to go live like he is for the sake of a drug. Really I shake my head. I just can’t believe that he could do this to himself (and us) after living that life so many years beforehand, surely he must remember how hard it was. 

Mother’s Day yesterday. Simon and Kylee and kids came out and spent half the day with me. Some yummy chocolates were given and eaten too. Even troublesome one rang and wished me Happy Mothers Day. 

These two when they get together usually always end up wrestling on the lawn…can’t help themselves. 

Right…..time to go start dinner.

BTW…. no weigh in. I don’t want to know. 

Recovery

 Well I knew my finger was going to be sore, BUT I honestly didn’t think it was going to be as bad as it has been. Today is the first day without some prescribed drugs. Today it’s just been uncomfortable. I just want this bandage off, honestly it’s a pain, but it has to stay on till I see the surgeon and that’s still 4 days way. It’s going to be embarrassing, the bandage, it’s so “grotty” already. I’ve tried to be independent and do things myself by using my thumb on that hand to hold things but yeahhhh…😘😳🤦‍♀️ I did put a sock on over it, but it felt too tight so I took it off. 

Today is the first day in over a week I think that I’ve eaten sensibly. Chocolate has been a daily “treat” BUT it had to end sometime and I made today the day. 

Anyways time to see if I can get some sleep 😴 

Have had op

 

Have had op, all apparently went well. 

Only day surgery so I was home a few hours after op.

I’m recovering ok, not in much pain. 

Weigh in…

Weigh in day again…. It’s been 2 weeks since I’ve weighed. Life hasn’t been easy, pretty darn stressful actually, but I think I’m starting to come to terms with all that’s happening atm. Anyways I’m up a kilo from last weigh….

This week I’ve been really good, ate sensibly, walked daily….then today slowly but surely I’ve eaten every Easter egg in the house…….

Omg why why ?? 

All gone now, tomorrow back on track. I’ve a week before my finger op and I want a bit more weight off…

Son has another Drs appointment tomorrow for another medically unfit to work certificate. While he is living the lifestyle he is it will stay that way. He’s lucky his has the leave accumulated.  Anyway enough about him, thinking about what he is doing to himself makes me so angry. 

Kylee took her kids camping Saturday night and came home Sunday for an Easter egg hunt. The kids had a ball….actually so did I hiding them all. 

They were meant to go to their Dads this coming weekend but he’s going to be busy so she has just booked another camping trip away next weekend before school starts. 

Nothing much happening. Starting to get a bit nervous about the op, but I’ll be glad to have the finger fixed. 

It’s late, time for dishes to de done, kitchen put back to normal and ready for morning. I have a work tomorrow, an early morning start. 

I’ll post next week sometime. 

No weigh in.

 Well, so much for trying to lose weight for my surgery for my finger operation. I was hoping to lose 5k…pfffft not happening. Why do I stress eat? No willpower at all….  Once I start eating the “junk” I can’t seem to stop. 

I had a phone pre admission appointment today. My weight was mentioned that I had recorded when I saw surgeon but I had to change that today. Ughhhhh embarrassing much.  

I’m going to dig deep for the next 2 weeks and see what I can do. Op is the 29th 

I’ve hardly seen son. He finally did see a Dr and get his foot seen too and get medical certificate for time off work. Think he starts again Wednesday. I know he did cancel a follow up appointment and he’s not filled his prescription for antibiotics 😞😳🤷🏼‍♀️

His problem not mine. But I do worry none the less.

ANOTHER big worry is my sister. Last week her heart went out of rhythm again and she ended up being bought up from her hometown to the hospital here. Thankfully it wasn’t as bad as last time but they had to make her defibrillator more sensitive and do a cardioversion on her. Her hubby rang me distraught to say she was being bought up my ambulance. He is not a well man so couldn’t travel up. Anyways all got sorted during the week and I drove her home over the weekend. Fingers crossed all stays well now..,,.don’t think I could handle too much more stress.

No weigh this morning as I left here at 5 am to go watch my grandies, their mum started work 5.15am and we didn’t want to wake them too early. As it was I had to wake them so I could get to work on time. Anyways had a quick look at scales when I finished and wasn’t good 🙇‍♀️🤦‍♀️  This afternoon I’ve written out menus for the week, shopped and hopefully I can get myself sorted out again. 

Time to start dinner prep….catch you next week. 

 

This week

 Will start off with the kids sports day. Wednesday was jump day, Friday was faction sports. A fantastic few days, but Friday was so cold and windy. Kids did great despite the horrid weather. Kids just don’t seem to feel the cold 😳 I can tell you I did, I had a skivvie, T shirt, rain jacket and fleece jacket on and still shivered. The wind was bitterly cold. The kids faction won which topped off the day nicely. Their Dad came down and took them out for a late lunch before he left which was great. 

Things are not going well with son. This week he has attended work one day, and I don’t think he’s there again today. He’s split his foot open was his excuse but he could still go fishing. He needed a medical certificate for clearance to work, couldn’t get a face to face appointment so made a phone consultation. They didn’t ring him he said, he waited 20 minutes for the call then turned his phone off 😞😕

Saturday morning he was going to work but driving there he said he was dazzled by lightning and ran off the road….the vechile is a mess. How he survived I don’t know. No transport now, or bed as vehicle had a roof top tent on that he was sleeping in. Now he has nothing. Won’t have a job soon I’m thinking if he keeps not going. His daughter who lives with us works in the same area and could take him…actually was meant to have this morning. Well that was the plan…. Be next to no wages this week, there goes the loan payment. 😕🤷🏼‍♀️

 

Weigh in day

 And after a week of high emotions which included lots of chocolate the scales showed me a gain of “only” 400grams. I expected a hell of a lot more than that. Guess exercising 6 days of the week helped there. 

Son, well he still using, still drinking, still living out of his car. Wants to throw his job in and head up north. Says he can get another job 😳 Where or how I don’t know. He has loan repayments for next 4 years as well. He has no qualifications or trade, has a criminal history so wouldn’t get police clearance. All I can see is disaster ahead and him losing everything that he has worked so hard for. Hubby really not impressed with his “stupidity” as he calls it. No, nor am I. He doesn’t want anything to do with him. I think it’s stupidly too, but I want everything to go back to what it was. But that’s not going to happen because he doesn’t want it too. I know he spiralling down hill and not a thing I can do. My heart breaks 💔

The family we were…..

Sister hasn’t seen him, I don’t know if brother knows what’s happening, the little ones are missing him.