Some days are good, some days are bad. Sometimes I just want to go hide, other days I am just so darn angry with the world and have tantrums, other days I just cry.
Trying to take it day by day and take care of us as we do need to live our lives to stay as healthy as we can….we are really going to need our strength later on.
Trying to do healthy and filling still…very hit and miss at the moment…but I am trying. Can't remember what I weighed last week, I did track it on my E-tools on the ww site but because I have quit ww I no longer have access to that. Anyways I am 300g down from the last weigh in I had at a meeting….so I must be keeping it reasonably together. Today has been horrendous, I couldn't sleep last night, my brain just wouldn't shut down and I walked the floor till after 2am then had a crappy day at work….have over eaten to the max.
As I said my feelings and emotions are all over the place. Paul wants to keep things as normal as he can so thats what we are doing. He had his last lot of radiation for the moment, it is helping the pain in his back, and next week he starts chemo. He will be able to do that at home, as he will carry a cassette type pump that will pump it through the port he has had already fitted.
Paul, taken early this year, he is now 30 kilo's lighter…having lost most of that in the last 8 weeks.