Sunday, May 29, 2016
Lost the plot !!
With all thats been happening in the last 12 months I sometimes wonder how I am still standing. Its been tough, bloody tough…
A terminal diagnosis and four family deaths…life is pretty damn sux sometimes.
My health has suffered badly in these 12 months…I have gained so much weight and I am uncomfortable. I hate looking in the mirror and seeing myself, I look and feel disgusting. No-one but myself to blame, I know that…I have eaten everyone of those emotions I have felt in the last 12 months. Its not as if I haven't tried to control myself, I have. I have tried to focus on controlling my diet…but something else happens and away I go again…chomp chomp chomp…
Now how do I stop it….how do I break the habit again, where do I find the strength to start all over again??? I am still a member of the online weight loss group, I did weigh in on Friday and report a gain….but since then I have had mother in laws funeral and the wake, and a weekend of family here.
Getting towards midnight here, work again tomorrow, but I can't sleep. I have been having trouble sleeping for a while, more so since I lost my Mum. My head is going around and around in circles…. I wish life was just a little bit simpler.