Just a quick one.....

Tonight I head off to Perth to catch a midnight flight to Melbourne, daughter will pick me up at airport at 5.40am....yawnnnnnn! Sure am looking forward to this break away thou. Shawn is very, very tiring and stressful to deal with .....but things are slightly better I think. He had his kids for 2 hours on Saturday afternoon...and despite all the drama's we had with Shawn before the visit he did enjoy his time with them. He has another interview with DCP this afternoon...so he's hoping he gets a bit of information on Hannah because as yet he has heard nothing from her or has been allowed to see her. These visits to the DCP office usually has him coming back here moodier than ever....so its good that I am off to Melbourne tonight.

ooooopps just had a knock on the door.....definetly glad I am going to Melbourne. It was the police, they have a AVO order to serve on Shawn from Hannah....Shawn will take it that it means there is no hope for them, and that is gonna send him over the edge methinks!! Thankfully as Shawn is at work and has that interview with DCP they are going to leave it with local police to serve later on.....this I am not looking forward to.

This is an edit....a few hours have past since the police were here, and I have rang DCP and told them how unfair it is that this AVO is to be served on Shawn with no warning and how concerned I am of his re-action to it. So they are going to let him know this arvo and explain the whatfor/how/whys and everything to him. I also told DCP he has to have some contact even if by phone with Hannah, they need to talk. Anyways I guess before I head off to Perth I will know what he's reaction will be....hope it is not as bad as I fear it will be.

Thinking I might jump on my scales before I go tonight.....just to see what number comes up so I can keep that in mind while I am away.....remind me peoples I have to be good!!!

Photo's of Shawn with his kids....hasn't little Shayden grown, he was a month old on Saturday.

It's Friday

Yay....its Friday...no work for me today which is even better....I need the me time!! It's been a long week. Shawn has been coming here for a meal at night, a shower, I pack his lunch for work next day and then he goes off and sleeps in his car. He says he is comfy enough.....so if thats what he wants and he is happy....so be it. Still don't know a lot that is going on with this Child Protection situation....he still has not seen his kids or spoken to Hannah and that really upsets him and we have had a few shall we say very tense moments here about this. He can understand that he is not allowed to see Hannah but surely she could ring him and let the kids say "goodnight Daddy" to him...that he seems to miss most of all. I have a horrible feeling this whole situation is going to explode big time but will wait and see what happens as it all unfolds. He has a meeting next Tuesday...but I am ringing DCP today to see if I can organise a child visitation for him, he needs to see them. I fly to Melbourne on Wednesday night so hopefully we can arrange something before I go.

yayyyyyyy am off to see my dear daughter (and future son in law) and catch up with some very dear friends. (A bit peeved off I not there now then I could have met Chris H and Nannette...but another time maybe!!)This trip is only for 4 days so it is going to be a full on time for me...but I can't wait!! Off to the footy on Friday night...Hawthorn verus West Coast. I know, I know...Eagles sux this year, but I am still a very proud supporter and will go there and sit there in my Eagles colours next to my daughter and her fiancee in their Hawthorn colours.....

Anyways despite all the upheaval I have stuck solidly to my point counting, my tracking, my eating and excersise and was rewarded last night at my ww weigh in with a loss which even astounded me of 2.1 !!! That leaves me .9 to lose this week and then I will be back to my goal weight.....wellllll within the 2 kilo extra they allow you anyways....but I getting there. Just not allowed to blow it when I go to Melbourne ehhhh??

Positives...

Shawn has had a interview with Child Protection and has been told he has to move out of his house and leave it for Hannah and the kids. He is not to go anywhere near the house or have any contact with them, all visitations will have to be supervised. He of course has nowhere to go, unless he sleeps in his car or on the streets, so looks as thou he'll have to stay with us till he can find somewhere. He very down, remorseful and unsure of the future but has agreed to 16 weeks of councelling, hopefully other treatments as well.....anything to get back Hannah and the kids. Maybe this will wake him up and he'll get himself back on track again, I hope so.

Weigh in was tonight and I am thrilled as despite a very unsettling week with Shawn and all these happenings I have stayed right on track .... and lost 1.8 !!! Yayyyyyyyyyyyy I am back on track, still have a ways to go to get back to where I should be, but am moving in the right direction...

Can't stop the tears

Well it has happened.....Shawn got home today and found an empty house and a letter for him on the table. Hannah has had too many restraining orders out on Shawn now and Child Protection has stepped in and removed her and the kids for their safety for which I don't blame them or Hannah for going. He is in tears, he is angry but is it his fault.....noooooooooo!! He has been trying he says, really trying, but when you tell him not hard enough as he still angry and moody, he starts ranting and blaming everything and anything but himself.

He has an interview with child protection tomorrow and will be told what he will have to do to sort this all out. Know from what he read out from the letter left for him he will have to have councelling, psychic treatment. God I hope he agrees to everything, and goes to this interview in a better frame of mind than what he is in now, if he loves Hannah and his kids as much as he says he does he'll have to.

Pray for him please....he really does loves those kids of his...but mainly pray that he gets the help he really needs.

Have put the brakes on....

Finally made it to my new ww meeting on Thursday evening and weighed in. Did not like the number that came up...was not good at all, higher than I have ever been, so decided there and then that was it, THE BRAKES ARE ON !!! So far have had a great week, have come in under points, each day I have tracked, have excersised everyday...this Saturday and today went walking with a friend for over an hour both days. The ww meeting was just what I needed, there were 5 other life members like myself who are over their goal weights, the talk was very inspiring which made me motivated so hopefully this time I can keep it up and not let any emotions over-ride my efforts.
Went to Dr on Friday after work and got the results of all my blood tests from my chest pain episodes. Other than gastric reflus I have a "bug" in my stomache, some big long medical name that I can't pronounce....but its nothing that a heap of antibotics and other pills won't get rid of. It's a wonder I don't rattle with the amount of pills I am having to take daily.
And just to top it off....add panadol for the headache in the name of my troublesome son Shawn. Hannah has just rang me to say she has taken a 24 hour restraining order out on him coz they are fighting, he is pushing and shoving and being a bully towards her. Sheeeeeeez when is that kid gonna get it together?? We were hoping with the birth of Shayden and the job (which he seems to love) would help him, apparently not! Anyways trying to NOT let it get to me....I can't help him till he helps himself....right?? But someone tell me HOW do you stop worrying, HOW do you get that horrible feeling out of your gut as you wonder "is he alright", what the hell is he going to do next???