Weigh in this morning resulted in a 1.5 gain. Really go figure 😨
Totally all me. No one to blame but myself. I knew what I was doing to myself. A little voice inside said it will be alright, next week you’ll lose it. So I ate some more. Felt sick, clothes were getting tighter. Little voice says it’s alright Jen you know what to do to lose it, you’ve done it before, next week will see it gone.
Really, I must be sick in the head 😱.
Why do I do this to myself?
It’s a nasty vicious circle in my head and somehow I just have to stop it.
I just have too. My weight is going up, and up and I don’t like it.
Actually I hate myself.
I just have to regroup and stop myself before it goes any further.
It’s starting to effect me, everything seems to be an effort. I ache. I am bloated.
I need to find the mindset to get myself out of this funk. This yo-yo’ing just has to stop.
I have to find me again.
That saying is so true, wish I had answers, but like you I am also eating way to much....some days I care other days I dont.
ReplyDeleteAwe I love how you put your feelings into words, although I feel sad for you. Please do not ever hate yourself. From what you have shared on your blog I only see a beautiful person who puts family first, probably at your detriment.
ReplyDeleteDay by day, hour by hour is all you can do to achieve what you are trying too, ie. lose weight and feel better about yourself. Have you thought about counselling, not to address grief etc but to really find help to address your weigh related demons. You deserve to give yourself the best care you can. You can do this Jen 💜💜💜