Saturday, November 28, 2020

Self sabotage...

The title says it all.

Im not doing well at all, UP another kilo this week. I can't, just can't get myself on track. I say to myself every day, "I've got this" then eat junk 10 minutes later.  I know I HAVE to reign this in otherwise all my hard work will be gone. I can see myself getter bigger and set in my old ways...BUT still I think.."it won't take long to shift, I've done this before" !!  But it will, I'm getting older and I ache. I know its not going to help me carrying this weight as I get older...I just have to find that mind set again. 

It's funny... I always seem to falter as I enter the eighty's or get close to them, and then self sabotage myself. 

I'm tired, need sleep. I had a good 3 hour nap this afternoon, then couldn't get to sleep tonight...so up now. But I'm yawning and ready to sleep again. 

Have to try again tomorrow. Even if I falter I have to keep on going. My poor Doctor as good as she has been, and helped and supported me so much I think is pulling her hair out in frustration at me. just as I am at myself....

So tomorrow...Im going to try again. And if I muck up, get straight back up and start again.....well thats what I am aiming for. 



1 comment:

  1. I’ve been thinking about self sabotaging a lot lately. What are we afraid of? What makes us quiver inside causing us to mess up on PUA pose aka self sabotage? I know I’m afraid to lose the fat suit I wear...because what will I blame my personal failures on. It’s easy to blame everything on my excess weight!

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