Happy New Year....

Wellllllllllllll I hope it will be anyways......






Yesterday things with Shawn and Hannah came to a head with an almighty EXPLOSION!!!!! Won't go into details but Shawn spent the night in jail. He had to go to court this morning and get his rap over the knuckles. But HOPEFULLY now.....I am not counting any chickens yet as I have been disappointed with Shawns promises so many times before....but it looks like it might work out for the best for him this time.

He says it is definetly ALL OVER with him and Hannah this time....he is now single....and he is going to smarten his act up and get off the dope. As I said before...we'll wait and see....

He also has to face Department of Child Protection for a breach of the AVO in the next few days. The kids are at the moment been taken into their care and Hannah is in a refuge. I just hope he doesn't lose any access to his kids because of this because no matter how bad that his behaviour is no-one can say he doesn't love his kids....



On the tracking front since the 27th I have been as good as gold.....not once have I gone over my point allowance....I am determined to get back into the 60's again and damn well stay there....


Been as hot as hot these past few days....thank heavens the packing shed I work in has a huge industrial pedastal fan right next to where I work...certainly would not have survived without it!!


New Years Eve....and we are home. I will be sleeping in the new year I guess...usually do, we are not the party type though sometimes I just wish we could go out and do something....maybe next year ehhh....



All the very best for a happy healthy New Year

Tomorrow is the day .....

IS THE DAY I START TRACKING AGAIN........

I hopped on the scales tonight after looking down and seeing a huge muffin roll over the top of my jeans and I just thought enough is enough! I need to control myself, get my shit together. I can't blame my hormones and thyroid running amok for just generally making a pig of myself like I have this week !!

AND talking about jeans there are not many pairs that I own that do fit me comfortably anymore AND I am not buying myself anymore because that would mean buying a bigger size and I REFUSE to do that!!!

Hubby and I have had a very quiet Christmas. Christmas eve we went and visited #2 son and family as they were heading down the coast for their christmas break and gave them their chrissy presents.
Christmas day the other 2 sons and families came out and we played santa.....the kids enjoyed their presents and their stockings. Later on in the day we picked up hubby's mum and drove out to Teds youngest brothers place and had a family gathering and a huge christmas lunch.

#1 son has his eldest son coming tomorrow for his access visit so they will come out again tomorrow. When he bought his other 3 kids out on christmas day I just gave them their presents and held back their chrissy stockings so they could open them up with Luke visited.

Just gathered up all the naughty nibblies...and put them away, whoever visits and wants them can take them. I do not want to see anymore chips, nuts, lollies or anything that I can nibble on.....I am going to be so good and want no added temptations.

Update....

Well I got my blood results ..... as I expected results showed hormones are "scattered", thyroid seriously under-active.....and I have way too much protein in my system. So nothing serious, but geeee who would think a few hormones and a thyroid could cause so much havoc to my body. The protein is nothing much too worry about, apparently its my body's way of trying to fight the upheaval of my hormones and thyroid running amok!! Anyways medication has all been adjusted and I will see how I go. Late February I have to go back and let the "vampires" take some more blood and see what is happening.

Our weekend away in Geraldton was great. My girlfriend Tina had NO idea at all we were coming for her 50th and just screamed when she saw us.....she was so excited. We all had a blast and had a great catch up over the weekend. We all ate too much, drank too much and talked and talked...it was magic !!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL

Weigh in

Well the picture says it all....I have been a real "Miss Piggy" and the scales tell me so !! I hopped on this morning and the numbers went up and up and up right up to the highest they have been for a long time! No-one to blame but myself....I have been out of control with my eating. Emotions swinging this way and that way and all good intentions went swinging along with them. So this morning I have trying to get me shit together and plan out a week of healthy eating. I have a real hard week coming up workwise....a week of very long hours, 2 nights where we will be doing 3 hours overtime making 12 hour days.....so need to be organised.

Anyways one day at a time is how I am gonna do it....this time of the year is hard enough so I will do the best I can but I have promised myself as soon as Christmas is over I am back to the ww meetings, its seems to be the only thing that keeps me honest. A girl at work, well she actually only comes in to help out when we are very busy, asked me if she could start ww with me in the new year .... so I might take her up on that.

ohhhh went to the "vampires" on Thursday and they took a whole heap of vials of blood, go see my Dr on the 18th and get my results....mmmm be interesting!

We are off to Geraldton next weekend for 3 whole days...I am taking the Monday off work so we can travel back (a 6 hour trip) and also so I can do my food chrissy shopping before work again Tuesday and Wednesday. Presents are done, managed to find something for all 11 grandies.... my mum and hubby's mum to buy for today and thats it. Parcels are going to wrapped today and will be posted...so I am very nearly arganised.

Anyways out of here...time for some fruit and yogurt.

Just a update

I have just received the best news...and what a relief it was too.

Hubby went to see his specialist about his prostate PSI levels and all is okay...he was told all was well, nothing to worry about, come back in 12 months for a checkup....woooooooohoooooooooo I can stop stressing about that !!!!

I also went to see my Dr...was really concerned about these 2 car accidents and need to be assured there is nothing wrong with me. I have been tired, bloody menopausal hot flushes are still causing sleepless nights and I think thyroid medication needs adjusting again. Anyways going to have a heap of blood tests so we'll see what happens.
I dropped and smashed a good plate last night when doing the dishes....hubby came and said thank god for that...thats the 3rd smash.....geeeeeee I hope so !!!

On the weight front......welllllll been mostly good, but haven't been totally evil so will keep on trying. Will see what the scales say on Sunday....

I don't believe it !!!

I just can't believe it.....I am so over myself !!!!

Today I went into town in my little work car....and somehow I have rear ended another car....thats TWO accidents in TWO weeks..WHAT IS UP WITH ME !!!!!!

There of course was lots and lots of tears...and stunned disbelief that it could happen!!!! Stupid man did take off, so I did too...but then he must have realised he had stopped at a stop sign and not a giveway sign and stopped and soooooo did I !!!! Damn, damn and double damn !!!!! Hubby has fixed the damage.....nothing major at all. Nothing major to the other car either and he is going to get in contact with me next week, thinks he'll get away with just getting a new back bumper.

SHEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZ !!!!! Beginning to wonder if there is something wrong with me.....I am going to go and see if I can see my Dr....maybe my concentration is being affected by my thyroid imbalance...worth checking out I guess.

Anyways this of course has affected my emotions today. Luckily I did weigh myself this morning as we are going away tonight and wouldn't be able to weigh tomorrow morning.....happy to report down 600 grams....sitting on 72.0. A bit high....know I not going to get it down to where I want it to be until the silly season is over....but heyyyyy I am trying!!!

A day early

After a very restless night last night, I woke up this morning and weighed myself......mmmmm was not good, up ANOTHER bloody kilo. But what else do I expect after all the darn "evil" things I have been eating. Too darn lazy to excersise... so haven't walked for the past 3 days.

But I will tomorrow...and tomorrow I will be back on track. Looking at that comparison photo I have decided I prefer where I am right now...not what I was!! Right .... its okay to indulge now and then, but to eat as thou there is no tomorrow like I am at the moment has just gotta stop!! These darn hot flushes don't help either !! Its been nice to relax and not worry about what food is going into the mouth ....but I DO need to keep myself focused before I totally lose control.

Anyways I have shopped....bought myself a lot of fruit and vege's and plan to make myself lots of salads, frittata's and soups... these will be a change from the same ole things I usually eat. Also want to get away from the bread at lunch time and replace it with some protein to help me get throu the afternoon.

We had a invation to a friends 50th birthday up in Geraldton on the 20th December...so my goal is to get myself back on track by then and fitting comfortably into my skinny jeans.....

Here I go yet again...but with some changes......

mmmmm....

mmmm...not gonna make the 60's this week....I have come "unstuck"....

Don't know whats caused it, just had a sudden urge to eat...and thats what I am doing....grrrrrrrrr

Hubby recons I not eating enough....maybe he's right....so thats what I will have to check. I know the points are right...BUT maybe the food I am eating is not enough to carry me throu the days....what with my working maybe I need more.....definetly time to check it out. I know I am stuck in a rut with my food....and I do need to vary my food a bit, I tend to eat the same things all the time....mmmmmmmmmmm definetly need to check this out.

All good....

The scales were kind to me this morning.
I resisted all temptation of emotional eating after my little "bingle" on Saturday. It was hard...but glad I did as the scales showed I was 900 grams down from last week.....making me now 70.1

Insurance company has been in contact with me, I have given them all my details, have my claim number and now have to get 2 quotes...and then my car can be repaired....

Now fingers crossed for another good week and let me get back into the 60's AGAIN !!!!!!

Yesterday....

Shawn had his access visit so had them out. On Friday it was Skye's birthday so Tanya decided she'd come out with her 2 girls for the access visit and let them spend some time with Skye and Jaydene, and let them give Skye a pressie...the kids had a lovely time....it was great to sit back and listen to the kids giggle and have fun together....it just doesn't seem to happen enough lately.....

Decided yesterday morning that I would go and do a bit more chrissy shopping....wishing to heck now I hadn't. Filled up with fuel at the servo and just taking off...and WHACK!!! Don't know what happened, I know I looked before I took off so who was at fault, me or him I have no idea...but we had a "bingle". My drivers side headlight and bumper is all smashed, his car has a scrape down the passenger side. Have rang my insurance company but being the weekend the matter has just been reported....so will have to wait till tomorrow to organise that! Was very teary and shaken for awhile but having the kids around sure helped.

Anyways just wanted to put these pics up....will be back tomorrow with weigh in update....

I did weigh

...and it was as expected up in the 70's !!!

Bloody yoyo I am...up, down, up, down !!

I was on track...and getting my shit together, then I for some reason or another have started getting damn hot flushes again. Wellll, more regulary anyways, as they have never really gone away, but since Thursday night I have been waking up as much as a dozen times a night with them.....and then during the day I am freezing cold!! This of course has caused mayhem with me!! Been a right regular grump I have and eating whatever I craved. Luckily I have been excersising....

Anyways last night the flushes weren't as bad....and I hopped on the scales this morning and recorded 71.0....so the saga continues as I battle those damn kilo's.

I'm back

and yayyyyyyyy I am back on track!!

It took me awhile, I'd get the tracker out, plan my day then it would start raining and I'd crave something hot and yummmyyyyyy and all good plans would fly out the window for another day.....

Or Shawn would ring and say ???......and yep Jen would reach for comfort food. Actually he hasn't been too bad the last few weeks...us giving him the final warning seems to have shook him up a bit. Just wish he would get rid of the drug once and for all!!! Damn centerlink is mucking him around, he hasn't got his tablets the Dr subscribed yet as he had lost his healthcare card.....still waiting waiting waiting for centerlink to post out a new one....

And another thing that happened....DCP let it be known to me that Shawn and Hannah have broken the AVO as Shawn has been seen at Hannah's house...eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkk!!!! Don't know what is going to happen there....but have been told by Hannah that she will lift the AVO. DCP have told me no the kids won't be taken off of them...but Shawn has to keep going to councelling and they will be monitored if they do get back together full time....

DAMN KID!!!!!!

Anyways all has been good for the last 4 or 5 days....no weigh in...not game enough for that but Monday next week I will .... all go for a great week..I hope...

Gone...

..... haywire. Don't matter how I try, I keep stuffing myself up. Start off the days all good, planned and tracked...then somewhere along the day or evening I will start craving and off I go....turn into a regular garbage patrol !!! No matter how hard I try not to give in to myself, I do.....soooooooo am giving myself a couple of days of rest and Monday I will get back into it (before if I can) BUT I am not weighing in on Monday....will the following one thou. Heck I don't want to see that I back in the 70's again (coz surely I am!!) after all the bloody hard work I have done. Looks like I will never learn this lesson of self-control!!

I weighed.....

..... in this morning.....and I quite happy, the results are not as bad as I thought they would be. I weighed in at 68.9 .... a gain of 600grams.

Work is still flat out ..... its going to be really busy till christmas. I was up at the usual time this morning BUT thanks to daylight saving it was DARK!! I hate daylight saving....it throws me right out of skilter!!

Hubby Ted got his specialist appointment...sees him on December 9th.....

Under control....

Have got myself under control again.....emotions are to the side, eating is once again under control and will now wait till hubby has received his appointment date with the specialist and will take it from there!! I know high PSI levels don't always mean cancer BUT the Dr said there was a risk of it...and that just sent horrible shivering chills through me!!!

Other news is yeahhhhhhhhh Shawn went to the Dr and YES has been given a script for medication which he said he will take. He has been out here today for his kids access visit, a little agitated as he is as sick as a dog with the flu....but said he will fill the script out...here's hoping!!

Monday I will weigh in again, but just at home, won't go back to ww till next month, so here's hoping all the rubbish I have consumed hasn't made the scales too high...will let you know Monday evening when I post again.

Thanks to you all for being there for me.....

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkk

Why is that when I under stress I eat!!! I am sure this last week I have managed to put on all I have lost these past few weeks!!

You would think after 3 years of weight watchers that I would learn to control the emotional eating........nahhhhhhh not me, I must be a bloody slow learner.

Nooooooo its not Shawn this time, this time its hubby. He has been having a few minor health problems and got sent off to have a few blood tests last week. Results came in last week and after a consult with his Dr the other day he was advised to have another blood test....welllllllll he got those results back today and has to go and see a specialist. Hubby has high PSA levels....and that means he COULD have prostate cancer. Dr says not too worry, the levels aren't THAT high but it could be a possibility. What does Jen do..PANIC !!!!! I know I shouldn't.....but I fear cancer....and I just hate the thought of my EVERYTHING having to battle it!! I know I am thinking the worst, heck he hasn't even seen the specialist....but eeeeeeeeeeeeekkkk!!!!

This week

This week has been absolutely stressful, emotional and totally crap!!! And why...the usual reason, my son Shawn...who else??

That kid really really needs professional help. I won't go into what has been happening, but his physcosis is getting worse....and after this week he has been given an ulimation of going to get help or forget that he has a family. We so sick of the abuse, physically and mentally....all of us have reached the end of out tethers. He was told either make a appointment to see a DR and get help or disappear out of our lives. Shit the kid turned 26 on Wednesday, and we have dealt with this problem of his now for way too long. I know people with acute physcosis people have little or no awareness that they are not themselves as they have lost the connection with reality....but enough is enough!!

Anyways it must have sunk in as he has made an appointment with our family Dr, told him it was an emergency but the earliest he can get in is Friday.....lets hope he can hold it together till then. He didn't make his forklift course, he was ill..but will try for it in a few weeks.

Anyways with all this turmoil I did my usual and tried to eat away the stress....but dear hubby told me what I was doing and I managed to stop myself and get back to tracking.....so this week I weighed in the same, heaps better than a gain I guess ehhhh?

Running late....

Sorry ...... am running late today. I did weigh in this morning and my scales told me I had a loss of 300 grams...so I have 300grams to go to goal. I worked late tonight, (we have orders a mile long), got home and found a reminder note in the mail about weight watchers meetings so decided to head off tonight and get it out of the way before I have to start paying for the meetings again. I hate weighing in at night ..... the scales showed I was a kilo heavier than what I was this morning.....but heyyyyyyyyyy what the heck I am keeping the 68.3 as my weight this week!!



Not a lot been going on this week....been all work, work and more work. Its such a busy time of the year for us and we are scrambling to keep up with the orders. I worked till 1pm on Saturday just so we could catch up a bit. Looks like we might have to do the same again this Saturday too.

Saturday arvo saw Shawn turn up ready for his access visit with his kids. He looks good, and he had a absolute ball with his kids...don't know who was the biggest kid there !! He sits his forklift ticket on Thursday, hope he passes that, it might give him a good self-esteem boost that he needs.



Sunday saw me and hubby out in the garden.....after I saw the start to Bathurst!!! Go the mighty FORDS!!!! I am a real rev head and love my motor racing. I wish I could have kept up with my speedway racing....I loved it and was good too!! But like most sports nowadays it had become too politicial, too expensive and when sports get like that the fun goes out of it. We got a fair bit done out in the garden, it is really starting to look good again, it got a bit "begraggled" over winter. Stopped at lunch time to watch the finish to the big race....but hopefully we can get out there next weekend and do some more.

And again...

.....another loss of 800grams.....woooooooooohooooooooo!!

Now I am only 600grams from my goal of 68 kilo's.....now I am wondering do I have it in myself to carry on and try to get down to my personal goal of 65 kilo's while I am going so well and am so motivated. Been told to stay where I am, been told that I look good as I am, but I am happiest at goal. When I first got to goal and was maintaining so well I felt really really good....I want to get that feeling back again.

I am still very happy with my hair....its great. Its just 4 strokes with the brush and a little bit of jel rubbed throu it with my fingers and away we go. Stays looking good all day!! Thinking I just might keep it like this.....

On the Shawn front.....had him out on Saturday as he had an access visit with his kids. He looks good, sounds good and is still actively looking for other work. Centerlink has him enrolled in a training course where he will sit his forklift ticket on the 16th October, and then he will start truck driving lessons. mmmmm I don't know if that is a good thing or not!! But we are hoping he will get a job from these courses.....he does know then he has to have drug tests whenever required. Maybe it will help him.
Anyways as long as he is happy, staying out of trouble, not causing me any stress it must be good ehhhhh?

Going down......

Another weigh in and I am going down ..... yayyyyyy for Jen as I back in the 60's again with a loss of 800grams this week. Proud of that effort as I have struggled with cramping pains in my back and leg which has made excersise very difficult, but keeping tracking track seems to have kept me on track.

Saturday morning I had a big rush around to find a hairdresser to cut my hair, I had a wedding to attend on Sunday and had left it too late to book in to my usual hairdresser. But find one I did.....and I had my hair cut short....what do you think? I like it this short, so easy to maintain espesially with my work.

Yesterday a very good friend of mine got married, the rain even cleared up for her as she walked up her garden drive on her Dad's arm....ahhhhh yeahhh had a few tears in the eyes I did. Lucky bugger is off on Thursday for 2 weeks honeymoon in Bali.

Things are still quiet in Shawns world, I have spoken to him a few times this past week, he still hasn't got work but is still actively looking and he seems to be in a good frame of mind and is staying out of trouble, or so he says .... so alls good.