Getting there

I think....

Have got myself on track again, and going well despite a few things happening. The scales are going down, but I won't hop on them again till next Monday. A little peek told me all was good
I went to a step class on Saturday morning, it was great, I loved it. I am not the most co-ordinated person but for a first timer I thought I did darn good!! And boy, I think its a workout, Sunday morning I woke up with aches where I haven't ached in a long time, but a 30 minute walk helped ease the poor muscles. Still a bit sore this morning but after another 30 minute walk the aches are easing. I will be back to another class next Saturday. In the meantime I'll try and walk most mornings before work.

Dear daughter is really stressing out, poor love. Her and her fiancee have just signed papers to buy a block of land and also signed papers to have a house built on it. Her fiancee is now requesting that with all the money that they have had to borrow (and all their savings now non-existent after paying deposits on land and house plans) that Kylee downsize her dream wedding plans! Just hope its only stress that is bringing this request on as my girl is in tears. Ohh just heard their loan has been approved, so here's hoping the stressing will have eased and calm has been found again!

Things are happening in the Shawn and Hannah camp.....don't know whats going to go on there. Hannah has started proceedings to drop the avo that DCP made her put on Shawn....but now DCP are saying if she does that they will make it will it a lot harder for her in getting the kids back. Drama's, drama's and more drama's...wonder if it is ever going to end? Right I know its their (Shawn and Hannah's) fault that they are in this posistion, what with Shawn and his drugs and his aggresive mood swings and Hannah and her dirty/unhealthy and non existent housecleaning ways. BUT dcp are just so unemotional and uncaring to anyones feelings. And I am not totally happy in the way the kids appear to be cared for. Shawn and hannah are asking questions about these issues.
Ohhh well despite all this I have stayed on track somehow.

Did I say

Did I say I had sorta found my mojo again?

Well I thought I had, I did get myself back on track for a few days then those darn menopause hot flushes started up again...right when I am trying to sleep!! My nights have been pure hell for most of this week, I am hot, then I am cold, I am tossing and turning and making hubby miss sleep too. And with all this I have been getting "restless legs" at night too...no matter where I put my legs they would ache and I'd have to move. So in all I have been having one shit of a week. And what happens when that happens, yep ya got it...."oink oink" It would be alright if I just overate...but nahhhh not me, I have to shovel it in as thou it was my last meal, I mean it I do, I gorge myself.

Anyways just been looking at my calendar....and its ONLY 9 weeks from today till I fly over to Melbourne....and if I don't get myself sorted out I won't be able to fit into any of my darn jeans!! So as of tomorrow morning I am going to try, and I mean really try to get myself back on track, can I do it....wish me luck !!

He really missed them

......and so did I !!!

Shawn had an access visit today, he had one last week too but I had to miss it due to our Americian friends coming in on the cruise ship, but today between 1pm and 3pm we entertained Shawn and his little cuties.

They were a little timid when they first arrived, but within 10 minutes or so they were into the toyboxes and found their favourite toys. Took Skye, the eldest girl, she is 5 now, a little longer to find the rapport we used to have. More little mite I really feel for her as she does understand a lot of what is going on !!

Jaydene the little girl, she is 2, and she is a real Daddy's girl and was really taking advantage of the 2 year old tanties!!

Shayden the baby (10 months) is still the same happy little chappy....glad he was old enough to bond with his daddy before all this happened as as you can see in the pics is devoted to Shawn.

Was a wonderful couple of hours.


Anyways everything else has been going well. Shawn has settled down a little, welllllll no more trouble from him. He received notification that he lost his licience for 5 months for his drink driving and a $800 fine....!! But today he was a lot happier within himself.

Me....well I have sorta found my mojo again...I am back into my walking and eating healthily. I have stopped the water running, too darn cold in the pool now, but have decided to do a pump or step class on a Saturday morning instead. I'm not going back to weight watchers till next month....but I will check what my scales say on Monday night.

Weekend....

.....has been a busy one so far.

We had some friends sail into Bunbury on Saturday on this cruise ship....

My hubby is a amateur radio operator and talks the world over on his radio...and had been talking to Will in Americia for a few years now. When Will and his wife Eileen said they were coming out to Australia and were going on this cruise they asked us and our friends and near by neighbours Neville (he is a radio operator too) and Margie if we would like to catch up with them when they docked in Bunbury for the day. We gladly said yes, and on Saturday we all went in to meet them off the ship.....then drove around to show them a few sights of Bunbury and surrounding areas before we had lunch at Neville and Margies. Margie made a beautiful pavlova for them to try, it being one of our traditional Aussie desserts....mmmmmmmm very yummy it was too.

Their stop in Bunbury was only from 8am to 3pm but we really enjoyed the visit.

After we dropped Wes and Eileen off at the wharf, we came home as we had a cousin and his wife visiting....I hadn't seen my cousin in years and had never met his wife. I found Helen on Facebook and arranged the meet up so we could have a catch up.

Shawn dropped in too.....darn DCP changed his access visit and he had it between 1 and 3pm but because I was busy with our americian friends he couldn't have them here....so he had to go down to the local park. Pretty pissed off about that I was, was so looking forward to catching up with the kids today!!! Anyways Shawn said he had a great couple of hours with them and next week the visit will be here on the Saturday. They better not change that one!!

I am feeling a lot better within myself today, the aches are slowly going, and tomorrow hopefully I can get my ass into gear and go walking again. I am missing it and the healthy eating....have really lost the plot this last week feeling like I have. ahhhhh well onwards I guess!!

A me day

Had a day off work today, an unexpected one but one I took gladly. Been suffering with aches and pains and feeling quite blahhhhhh. Can't be bothered doing much at all, its just all seems like its too hard and too much of a chore. Went to water running last night, the water helped the aches and pains for a bit, but I couldn't do the full hour, so after cool down I languished in the spa, ahhhhhh bliss!!!

This morning the aches and pains were still there after a restless tossing and turning night, so no walking for me. And the eating...well the "oink oink" factor is back again. I rang my ww leader today for advise and she said just let it happen, don't stress about it and as soon as I feel up to it I'll get back on track and because I am a life time member and have weighed in this month she'll see me next month.....so thats what I am going to do, just go with the flow. Hope this feeling like I do doesn't last too long, I hate feeling blah and out of control.

Knowing late yesterday I was going to get today off I quickly rang my hairdresser and booked in for a much needed cut and colour. I am not sure now if I made the right decision now thou....I went for a burgundy colour base as I wanted a darker colour than I usually have with the gold and blonde foils. Just got to get used to it I think.

On the Shawn front all is quiet. Will see him on Sunday as he has an access visit with the kids here. I spoke to his DCP case worker today and he said he had a visit with him the other day and has agreed to go throu some rehab and councelling....so we'll see, with Shawn things change so quickly.

Will post again after the access visit, can't wait to see the kids again, I saw Shayden back on my birthday in February but it seems like forever since I have seen the girls.

mmmmm

Its just as I expected I had a gain at my weigh in tonight......BUT what else can I expect, my bad week was very bad and apparently my good week wasn't good enough to counteract it....one day I might learn mmmmmmmmm !!!

Not much has been happening....no added stress from Shawn....

And its a very happy birthday to my little munchkin Zoe...she turned 6 yesterday. Rang her up to wish her the happiest of birthdays and little miss haveachat filled me in on all that was happening. She got rollerblades for her present but she says she spends more time on her bum than she does on her wheels. My little babies are all growing up so quickly!

Getting myself under control

Well have got myself back on my track......told that little devil on my shoulder to rack off....and placed the halo back on my head. Since I dropped Kylee and Stephen off at the airport in the early hours of Tuesday morning I have been back on track so we'll see what my weigh in on Monday night will be...that will be very interesting.

Not much being happening here, Shawn has been reasonably quiet and staying out of trouble. This morning I have spent with Hannah doing some op shopping....just to get her out and about. She has been really depressed missing the kids (no, she still hasn't heard when she'll get them back, next week she has a meeting with DCP) and to top it off while she was out last night babysitting her house was broken in to .....

Will update on Monday night....

P.S. 9.oopm ..... mmmm did I say all was reasonably quiet on the Shawn front......welllllllll not no more. Big trouble in the making methinks!!!!! Hope not....I DO NOT NEED THIS STRESS!!!!!!

Done it again....

Don't know why I do it BUT I seem to do it all the time. I get to goal, or very close to it and I lose the plot and turn into a real little "oink" and eat everything in sight!!! Hasn't helped that I have had dear daughter (and her fiancee) home for her best friends wedding....Kylee was maid of honor and I was so proud of her, she was Jess's tower of strength from the time she landed here in WA and on the day she looked absolutely stunning, as of course did the bride.

In between all her bridesmaid duties her and Stephen have been able to organise a lot of plans and make bookings for their own wedding next year.

And while Kylee has been with Jess, Stephen and I managed to go out and buy me a new desktop computer.....mmmmm thankfully he was able to set it all up for me too and transfer all my files and folders that I needed over too....ahhhhh he is the best!!

On the Shawn and Hannah front, things aren't too good. They got reported to DCP for seeing one another and on Friday Hannah had the kids taken off her and put into foster care....we will find out on Tuesday if or when Hannah will get them back.

Anyways I take Kylee and Stephen up to the airport tonight, so things here can go back to normal, and hopefully I can rein my piggy self back in and get back to eating healthily and sensibly again and get back into the excersise too, I have only walked once in the last 4 days...SLACK ehhh? It being a public holiday today I have no weigh in so I have a week to get back to where I was...!!!!!

Had 4 of the grandies

Had Simon and Tracey's kids on Saturday arvo throu to Sunday arvo and what a delightful time we had. We went shopping for ingredients to make little english muffin pizza's for tea Saturday night, swimming, to the park....and just had a great time. The girls bought down their little tents and sleeping bags and they all "camped" in my lounge room with the boys sleeping on the sofa bed.

They are growing up so fast...little Thomas turns 3 this year and the favourite word at the moment is NO!! He was really so good considering he had never had a night away from mummy and daddy. The other 3 have stayed over many times and know how to wrap their Jenna around their little fingers. Sheymus celebrated his 4th birthday the day after mine...so of course for dinner Saturday night we had the big birthday cake.

I am just doing a quick post, leaving to head off up to Perth airport in 10 minutes to pick up darling daughter and her fiancee...Kylee is home for a week this time, she has a heap of things to organise for her wedding next yearbut the main reason for being here this week is that on Saturday she will do bridesmaid duties to her best friend.

ohhhh weigh in was last night, officially a 60's girl again and in the allowed 2 kilo's allowed over goal weight....woohooooooooo!!!

Happy Birthday to me

Today I was able to finish work early, so decided it was time to go and visit with Hannah. We had a bit of a catch up and were able to sort out a few things. Not happy to hear from her that she has seen Shawn a couple of times...they will lose the kids all together if this persists, the silly buggers!! She too is very worried about him...but what can we do, he won't listen!! Anyways I am going to have the kids in a few weeks time for a weekend just to give Hannah a break, she looks great but is very tired. Was delighted to have mega cuddles with little Shayden, he is really growing fast, at 9months old he is standing on his own....no steps yet thou. Isn't he a cutie? Skye was at pre-school and Jaydene was at kindy so I missed out on seeing them.

I have had a great day....lots of phone calls, lots of messages on Facebook, some lovely gifts....and some time for me.

Even Shawn came out tonight to gather up some gear, reminded him he is getting no help from us anymore...he is on his own now. Will feed him but no more money lending, not letting him go poison himself more with dope and booze. He had a face a mile long, but I have to be strong...tough love they say!

Tomorrow I am having Simon and Tracey's 4 kids overnight...aged from 7 years down to 2.5 years....its going to be awesome. Sheymus turns 4 tomorrow so we'll be able to have a little party for him.

It's Monday again...

And the weekend is over....

Actually it wasn't a bad weekend....I achieved a fair bit. But the biggest achievement was making the FINAL morgage payment on this house, what an awesome feeling that was! Now we are debt free, just have to start stacking up a few dollars in the bank account so we can retire.

Shawn was his usual charming self when I saw him on Sunday.....got himself in more trouble with the law and got a work order put on his vechile. So we are taking his vechile off him, he owes us nearly $2,000, some that he did borrow to buy his 4x4, and the rest he borrowed to tide him over when he and Hannah split. But since the split his behaviour and his attitude has got worse, and since he is going to lose his licience in a few weeks for that drunk driving episode a few weeks back he won't need it. So going to repossess it and see if we can sell it! He hasn't looked after it very well, so don't know how we'll go. But he has made no attempt to try and repay us, or look for a job...seems to think we are going to keep on getting him out of his little bothers.....but nahhhh not any more.

Anyways went in to weight watchers tonight for weigh in....nearly a 60's girl again....another kilo gone !!!!

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!

This little piggy went to market.
This little piggy stayed at home.
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none.
And this little piggy went "Wee! Wee! Wee!" all the way home

That poor little piggy that had none.....well thats my fault coz I the piggy thats had the roast beef and everything else in sight. The cravings came with ttom and no matter how much I tried to resist I just couldn't and before I knew it I was going to bed with a tummy full of CRAP!!!

TTOM is crap too...I thought they had gone....but nahhhhhh they back, thou very light but enough to cause me those darn cravings. Menopause is sux, thou I guess I should be happy that the hot flushes have gone...haven't had them in awhile.....but then again I shouldn't say thet either coz I said that about ttom too ehhh?

Went to ww on Monday evening for my weigh in.....tad disappointed that I stayed the same but really on thinking about it no one to blame but myself....I didn't track and when I don't do that those little extra's do find themselves into my mouth.

On the Shawn front, court went well he said, copped himself a fine is all. He is trying to straighten himself out BUT not hard enough. He gets with his so called "mates" and starts the drinking, and that leads to the dope and usually that combination leads him to trouble.

He has court again in 2 weeks....thats for him and Hannah and settling the matter with DCP and the kids. ohhh and talking about kids...I am to be a "Jenna" again, Hannah is expecting another little boy in April. Shawn will be a dad of 4...sheeeez and he still acting like a kid himself.

Had the ultasound....

I had a couple of hours of work yesterday and rushed off into town and had the ultrasound. Was very fasinating actually....and no it didn't hurt, well not much anyways!!! The lady using the transducer pressed it that hard into my chest it darn well hurt....I actually have a bruise. Anyways its all done and I go to my Doctor on the 17th, by then he'll have the results from the mammogram and echocardiograph....

NO work today so I have had a day at home catching up on a few chores.....other than those done not much at all. Was nice to have a bit of a lay in bed this morning....and I actually walked in sunlight and did an hour instead of the 30 minutes I do as the sun is just coming up!!

Shawn came out knowing I had the day off....nothing much changed there...he's not getting any better, worse if anything. Drinking too much alcohol and still using the drugs. He goes to court tomorrow for a disorderly contact charge, thou if you ask him its not his fault, the trouble is he reckons it never is, always someone else started it!! Anyways he took off with a change of clothes for court, hope he goes, if he doesn't he is up for a $10,000 fine or a 3 month jail sentence. Mmmmm ..... maybe a stint inside will dry him out !!

I weighed in

Last night I went in to weight watchers and did my weigh in. Was pleased to note that despite my blow out last week over the last 2 weeks I have lost a kilo......yayyyy me!! Am getting there ehhhh?

Welllllll I had a marvellous surprise on Saturday. I was in town to doing my usual shopping when I received a phone call from my DIL asking me how long I was going to be as she was at home waiting for me to come home and have a cup of coffee with her. Told her I was on my way, be there in 15 minutes.....and I was. When I got home I walked out the back and into the garden where DIL was sitting with Shawn AND my daughter Kylee!!!!!!!

Kylee had flown home that morning and wowwwwww what a surprise. She had come home to surprise her best friend Jess who was having her hens night that evening....as Kylee said you can't have a hens night without the bridesmaid ehhhhh?? And boy did Jess get a surprise....she was soooooo happy to see Kylee.

Kylee flew home today...but will be back for the wedding in 3 weeks.

Tomorrow I am off for the next test....I have my heart ultrasound.....here's hoping its painless and nothing untoward gets found.

One test done...

......one more to go.

Finished work early yesterday arvo and went in and had the mammogram....at the best they are uncomfortable but sheeeeeeeeeeeez when they squashed my sore one I nearly went through the bloody roof!!! My boob was feeling a lot better, the nipple soreness was nearly gone, that was until the big squash!! Since then its been darn sore......

Alls been going well on the satisfaction ww plan.....I am still enjoying it. Hopefully this weekend I won't lose the plot and wreck my weigh in on Monday evening. Other than that one blow out last week all has been going well so I should have a reasonable loss.

My girlfriend and I have started walking together again, plus we are going to a water running class that has just started up every Wednesday evening. Deb is a ww life member too and is the one that got me into weight watchers and dragged me to my goal with lots of encouragement and support. Now the tide has turned and its me that is offering her that encouragement and support plus more as due to some very emotional times these past few years Deb has put all her weight back on plus more.

mmmmm no change on the Shawn front....he still the same, this past week we have hardly seen him, he has been hanging out with some "mates" we would rather he stayed away from, but as he says he is a big boy now!! His behaviour really is going to get him into a heap of trouble, he has already received papers to say he is going to lose his licience due to drunk driving, a breathaliser recorded .08 so looks like he'll be walking for awhile!

Public Holiday

Being a public holiday today there will be no weigh in for me tonight. Maybe thats just as well because I had a "blow out" on Saturday night. Got a craving for chocoalte so I ate it, then ate some more...and then more.....

But Sunday was back on track and today as well.....I want to see those numbers on those demon scales go down when I stand on them next Monday evening.

Have had a great long weekend so far, done nothing and been nowhere...have just pottered around here doing nothing much at all....been very relaxing. Managed to read a few books, play on the pc and read some blogs.....and still have a few more hours yet to continue doing nothing. Even managed to get outside and do a bit of sunbathing, after spending most of my time in the shed at work it was lovely to feel the sun on my skin.

Even Shawn has been reasonably well behaved....but heyyyy I won't say anything too much as we still have this evening to get throu. Just wish someone would come grab him and take him away and lock him up in a rehab centre somewhere and dry him out...the dope is really starting to effect him more than ever ....

Long weekend....

.....and I am sooo looking forward to it, it's been a long and busy week espesially at work. The amount of carrots I have graded and that have been packed this week has been up over 28 tons a day, thats over a 140 tons that have gone out of this farm this week, our truck driver has been busy!! Geeeeeee it makes you wonder how many carrots people eat ehhhh, cos the pre-packing machine (where carrots go into 1/2 and 1 kilo bags) has been busy all week too!!

We are not going anywhere, just staying at home and relaxing. I have a few books to read, some gardening to do and thats about it....any other chores can wait.....

After work today I had a Drs appointment, the last few weeks I have had a sore nipple on one of my boobs, plus on and off have been having a few chest pains. I have had no pain when exercising, only when I am resting...so thought I better get it checked out. Anyways I off to have a mammogram which I thought I would have to have and also have to have a heart ultrasound as my Dr heard a heart murmur.....geeeeeeeeeee I am falling apart!! Will be heading off to those as soon as I can get appointments.

All else is going well. Food wise, I am doing well...excersise too. I started doing water running on Wednesday with a friend and will be doing that every week now, we had a real good workout. Also looking into doing another class of cardio of some sort on Saturdays as well....just to help us keep on track.

Still Satisfied....

Weighed in tonight and another kilo gone....

Just loving this program.....thou must admit I haven't followed it properly tonight, sorted treated myself just a little....haven't gone overboard. Know I shouldn't have but got weak and gave into to my craving. I wouldn't have been craving if I followed the menu I had set for myself today.....but after I got home from work and found the power off, I had to change plans....and that changed everything......tell ya I was weak!!



All else is going well...Shawn is back in court on January 29th, by then he should, if he gets off his arse, have legal aide. He has been swinging between good and bad, he has been running amok with his mates, been in some trouble with the law....but seems to have settled down the last few days. Moods are not always the best but I guess things will get better....hope so!



Yesterday we went to a family reunion on hubby's mothers side....was very interesting following the family tree. Hubby had a great time catching up with family, some he hadn't seen since they were kids. This pic was taken by by neice there....was a hot day and I think I must have consumed a gallon of water.

Satisfied

I am satisfied....

The new weight watchers SATISFACTION program is working for me.

I am eating more, and foods that are filling me and keeping my hunger levels on a even keel so that most of my snacking has stopped. I am not craving any sweets and not tempted to eat any....I just can't believe how well it is working for me. And I think eating the more filling foods are helping me cope with any emotional eating. Fruit and vege's, pasta, rice, potato's and grains, dairy products and fish and eggs and soups have all been in my menu's. By focusing on these filling foods I am making my points allowance go further and it ensures that I am not going hunngry,,yayyyyyy!! We'll see on Monday evening when I go in for my weigh in but I am confident that those scales will be down again.

It's my eldest grandaughters 7th birthday today. Rang her up to wish her all the best and got all the news...our Jessica is just like her Dad ... loves to talk!!

Its a busy birthday week

A busy week for birthdays in this household it has been and still one more to come yet

First up my darling little sister ( who by the way is 6 inches taller and 10 kilo's lighter than me !!! ) turned 49 on the 6th January....the big 5o next year sis!!!


Then little Jaydene turned 2 on the 7th...but unfortunately due to the strife with Shawn and Hannah she was in the refuge with Hannah so didn't get to see her.

On the 10th middle son turned 35, he shared that day with a very good friend of mine....then yesterday the eldest son turned 39.

Then on the 16th my eldest grandaughter turns 7....geeeeeee time surely scoots by doesn't it?

This week has been my first week of the new weight watchers satisfaction program....I love it. I call it "coits" and find it mainly core foods with points. Its working for me....I lost 1.8 at weigh in tonight...yayyyyyyyyy!!

Shawn and Hannah go back to court this week....maybe a decision will then be made about Shawn and the kids. Its all to complicated to go into on here....but its a BLOODY mess!!! But I am trying my hardest to let my emotions rule my eating and have been winning.